Life Plan B: World Peace

Bookmobiles bring books to people, meeting the people where they are. But what if the place where the people are doesn't have roads? Bookmobiles can't go there. Imagine yourself camping along the great coast of Northern Lake Michigan. You might be on Beaver Island. Imagine yourself running out of books to read. You are without roads. No bookmobile to save you. You are in danger of getting bored. Life Plan B is your saving grace.

Life Plan B is to commandeer a sail boat and turn it into a Book-mo-Boat. The Book-mo-Boat works like a bookmobile, except it specializes in locations only accessible by water. I'm creating a search committee for a qualified crew (p.s. I'm the Captian and Katie is the First Mate). Here are the main qualifications:

Applicants must:

• Put water safety first, understanding that if they do not know how to swim, they will be wearing a life preserver at all times.
• Have a sense of adventure, and dream of a life on the high seas of Lake Michigan.
• Like to read. There won't be anything else to do on the Book-mo-Boat.
• Be able to go for long periods of time without internet access.

Preferred qualifications:

• Not susceptible to sea sickness.
• Be a master at the art of the reference interview.
• Have experience in fending off Somali pirates.

The last preferred qualification brings me to my main worry about the Book-mo-Boat, and my suggestion for world peace. After our summer on Lake Michigan, the Book-mo-Boat will sail to the uncharted waters off the coast of Somalia. This is dangerous. About as dangerous as getting involved with un-chartered charter schools. But, we will be a brave crew. If the pirates want our Book-mo-Boat, they can have it. I imagine that the pirates will get so caught up in the wild adventures they find in books that they will abandon their wicked ways and civilize themselves. Andrew Carnegie would love this idea.

There are some Book-mo-Boats already in existence. We'll model our best practices on their experiences:

Norway has a book boat!

The book boat made the Encyclopaedic Dictionary of Library and Information Science!

Sweden also has a book boat!

Lao Children's Library Boat (just photos)

Please just write a little sentence or two about why you want to sail on the Book-mo-Boat with me and First Mate Katie and leave it in the comments to this post. The Book-mo-Boat, should Life Plan A (full-time library employment) not come together, will leave port at dawn on July 1, 2009.

Plan D: Donkey Ball

I have made an important discovery for anyone out there looking for Life Plan D. If this whole librarian thing doesn't work out, I'm considering putting my marketing and outreach skills to good use by becoming a donkey ball promoter. The sport, also known as donkey basketball, is similar to standard basketball; the key difference is that a player must be on the back of a donkey in order to score points. Donkey ball events are often organized to draw crowds to fundraisers. As far as I can tell, scores are typically much lower than in human-powered basketball. Please see the following:

Thomas, Katie. (2009). Donkey Ball Stubbornly Holds on Despite Criticism. New York Times, April 17, 2009. Available online at: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/18/sports/othersports/18donkey.html.

• This article provides an introduction to the history, current practice, and controversy surrounding the sport of donkey ball.
• Donkey Ball Operator Leticia Kwall describes the whimsicality of the activity: "Normally when you see animals, people are in control. In this forum, the reason it’s so entertaining to children is that the donkeys are totally in control of the situation."
• As if you needed further impetus to click on the link above, here is a sample of what awaits you:
  

Thanks, New York Times!

For looking for further information about professional "assletes," I recommend these donkey athletic profiles put together by a donkey ball company in Vermont.

For fellow information professionals in need of direction, might I suggest you carve out a niche in the field of donkey ball informatics? There are myriad design possibilities in this market -- consider donkey ball trading cards (or e-trading cards), donkey ball apps for Facebook and iPhone, or building the first donkey ball online community. I'm issuing a call to action, friends: it's time to bring donkey ball into the Web 2.0 world.

Plan C: Librations

I was recently browsing the encyclopedic section of The American Heritage New Illustrated History of the United States Volume 12 (published 1971) and I found this amazing picture of a bar that had been turned into a library during the Prohibition. This both made me infinitely glad that there is no Prohibition on, and got my wheels turning. Life Plan C is now to open a library that sells beer. We're calling it Librations. Emily and Katie: librarians by day, librarian/bartenders by night.

Any Happy Hour ideas?